Frequently Asked Questions about Divorce Mediation

• I want to get a lawyer and sue that *&!^%@ for all they're worth!  What's wrong with that?

   

  You certainly have that right, but take a step back from your intense anger for a second and look at the bigger picture.  You hire an expensive lawyer. go for the jugular and think you're going to take your soon-to-be-ex to the cleaners.  But you are not operating in a vacuum.  Your soon-to-be-ex will likely do the same thing. 

   

  Then you will both spend a lot of money trying to convince a judge you're right.  But keep in mind that the judge is not interested in your bickering.  In fact, many judges find that to be a complete waste of the court's time.  The court has criteria the state has given them to determine alimony, child support and equitable distribution.  You can find them in the resources section of this website.  See if you can find your motivation for sticking it to your soon-to-be-ex in the list of criteria.  I suspect you will not.

   

  There's an old maxim: courts give litigants what they need, not what they want.  And if there are kids involved, they will see nothing but bitterness from their parents.  Is that what you want to raise your child or children with?

   

  In my opinion, life is too short.  Ten years from now, all you will remember is the legal bills and what you could be doing with all that money you gave to the legal system to achieve very little.  Remember back ten years to a stressful situation you went through and how insignificant it seems today.  The best revenge is moving on with your life and living well.

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